Feral Fery started life a little bit rough
His climb up through Mummies rough just wasn't enough
His way was to be harder than most
A speeding juggernaut with no time to stop
Put an end to his Mummies clock
Hero EJ was on hand
She set him free
And with her merry band
Began the journey of helping young Fery stand
All be it in reasonable health
Young Fery was in no state to look after himself
The vets was the only option
No potions, lotions or magical concoction
Just a good feed a caring adoption
Now Feral Fery is in safe hands
One day he will grow and begin to stand
At first a hop and then a bound
He will be up up up and around
Written by Lloyd Burnard
Not much to do with the story but i thought i looked good with fake pigs ears
Tuesday, 31 August 2010
To Coral Bay we shall go...
After a bloody good knees up watching a touring band called 'The Sneaky Weasel Club' last Wednesday it was mentioned that they were playing in Coral Bay the following night, which is an hour or so South of Exmouth, so after discussing some finer points with the band and a little convincing from Finny (in the red checker shirt) and Nick (in the black jumper), it was decided we were off to Coral bay. Not much convincing i might add something along the lines of;
Finny...
'Hey Lloyd, fancy going to Coral Bay to get smashed tomorrow, this band are playing again'
Nick...
'Yeh lets tear up Coral Bay, it'll be funny as fuck'
MongaLloyd...
'Well I have lots on, i mean i could reschedule my hair appointment but i'm not sure about the Lloyds gay time and his manicure, he needs a good rest after a big bender nowwa days, i'll see what i can do, i'll keep you posted, ok.'
Ok, ok. I lied i didn't say any of that. In fact I just looked them dead in the eye drooled a bit and slurred...
'Fuck yeh, hows we gettin there, cause i'm way to pissed to drive straight and for that long without hurting someone!'
So it was arranged i convinced Dan to join us and our good friend Karen and that was it an adventure in Coral Bay was set in stone, although it was agreed that i shouldn't drive.
It turned out to be a night full of mystery and weirdos and weirdness, mainly weirdos meaning mainly us lot. Myself, Dan and Karen rocked up about 6 with Nick and Finny already on it and causing trouble in the local backpackers, it didn't take us long to join in. We met some fellow numbskulls and proceeded to the local pub.
Coral Bays local pub is revered all over WA, not because of it's idilic surroundings, amazing location or it's somewhat mishap characteristics but for one thing and one thing only. It's the only bar outside of Perth where you can buy shots! I'm not kidding people drive for hours to come here to get smashed on Yager Bombs, Titty Twisters and just good old fashioned Sambuca!
After lots of said shots some serious dancing was to be had on the somewhat small dancing area when the band kicked off, don't worry it conveniently had a pole in the middle so Monga managed to impress everyone with his amazing pole dancing/strip tease dance moves, i'm not sure if when drunk i've been to to many strip joints or i've worked at them, either way, I know how to work the pole!
Monga also tried to explain the Cock or Balls game to anyone who would listen, most of you won't of heard of it, it's a game I use to get the night going and to make people relax and feel at ease with one another. Basically you pull out either your cock or your balls whilst trying to mask its true appearance and get people to guess 'Cock or Balls?' easy really, but, heed my warning, it can go wrong.
And unfortunately for Finny, it did. He just didn't get it and Nick was almost there but the game somehow got lost in translation and ended up with both of them dropping their trousers and walking around shouting 'COCK OR BALLS, COCK OR BALLS?!'.
Although highly amusing and impressively confident it didn't go down the storm it was meant to, Finny even argued with the Management that it was a legitimate game and that it would be unfair to punish him for it, he was saying this whilst Dan was doing his trousers up for him, there's a photo of it in the slideshow and below it I had to blur out the offending implement as i'm not sure Finny would want it blasted over the net, anyway all be it a feeble excuse when there's 70 angry parents and other patrons weighed out by the 20 or so that did find it very funny. But give him his due he pulled it off and didn't get the boot.
It all gets a little blurry after that but it was one messy and hilariously funny night, it just proves that no matter where you are in the World like minded amazing people are always there to hangout and cause a scene with, cheers to everyone that laughed with us and the same to some of you that laughed at us!
Finny...
'Hey Lloyd, fancy going to Coral Bay to get smashed tomorrow, this band are playing again'
Nick...
'Yeh lets tear up Coral Bay, it'll be funny as fuck'
MongaLloyd...
'Well I have lots on, i mean i could reschedule my hair appointment but i'm not sure about the Lloyds gay time and his manicure, he needs a good rest after a big bender nowwa days, i'll see what i can do, i'll keep you posted, ok.'
Ok, ok. I lied i didn't say any of that. In fact I just looked them dead in the eye drooled a bit and slurred...
'Fuck yeh, hows we gettin there, cause i'm way to pissed to drive straight and for that long without hurting someone!'
So it was arranged i convinced Dan to join us and our good friend Karen and that was it an adventure in Coral Bay was set in stone, although it was agreed that i shouldn't drive.
It turned out to be a night full of mystery and weirdos and weirdness, mainly weirdos meaning mainly us lot. Myself, Dan and Karen rocked up about 6 with Nick and Finny already on it and causing trouble in the local backpackers, it didn't take us long to join in. We met some fellow numbskulls and proceeded to the local pub.
Coral Bays local pub is revered all over WA, not because of it's idilic surroundings, amazing location or it's somewhat mishap characteristics but for one thing and one thing only. It's the only bar outside of Perth where you can buy shots! I'm not kidding people drive for hours to come here to get smashed on Yager Bombs, Titty Twisters and just good old fashioned Sambuca!
After lots of said shots some serious dancing was to be had on the somewhat small dancing area when the band kicked off, don't worry it conveniently had a pole in the middle so Monga managed to impress everyone with his amazing pole dancing/strip tease dance moves, i'm not sure if when drunk i've been to to many strip joints or i've worked at them, either way, I know how to work the pole!
Monga also tried to explain the Cock or Balls game to anyone who would listen, most of you won't of heard of it, it's a game I use to get the night going and to make people relax and feel at ease with one another. Basically you pull out either your cock or your balls whilst trying to mask its true appearance and get people to guess 'Cock or Balls?' easy really, but, heed my warning, it can go wrong.
And unfortunately for Finny, it did. He just didn't get it and Nick was almost there but the game somehow got lost in translation and ended up with both of them dropping their trousers and walking around shouting 'COCK OR BALLS, COCK OR BALLS?!'.
Although highly amusing and impressively confident it didn't go down the storm it was meant to, Finny even argued with the Management that it was a legitimate game and that it would be unfair to punish him for it, he was saying this whilst Dan was doing his trousers up for him, there's a photo of it in the slideshow and below it I had to blur out the offending implement as i'm not sure Finny would want it blasted over the net, anyway all be it a feeble excuse when there's 70 angry parents and other patrons weighed out by the 20 or so that did find it very funny. But give him his due he pulled it off and didn't get the boot.
It all gets a little blurry after that but it was one messy and hilariously funny night, it just proves that no matter where you are in the World like minded amazing people are always there to hangout and cause a scene with, cheers to everyone that laughed with us and the same to some of you that laughed at us!
Labels:
Comedy,
Musings and Photos
Monday, 30 August 2010
Whale fish...
Exmouth Gulf, no surf and glorious weather makes for a day on the water looking for adventure. This is what happens when you chance across a Humpback Whale and it's calf, she didn't appreciate me getting to close and charged at me whilst trying to whack me with her side dorsal fin, after some swift backing off she reverted to a full on tail swipe. It's obvious how close it gets but man, you should have felt the power from that tail and the speed at which it moved was immense.
One awe inspiring moment, that is what it's all about!
Photo, Dan Waite
One awe inspiring moment, that is what it's all about!
Whale fish from lloyd burnard on Vimeo.
Photo, Dan Waite
Labels:
Eye Snacks,
Marine LIfe
Monday, 23 August 2010
Liquid Life
Since being here I have seen some pretty amazing things. The Indian Ocean that cradles the Exmouth Peninsula is teeming with a huge variety of marine life. Here's just a small sample of what i've seen, enjoy.
Liquid Life from lloyd burnard on Vimeo.
Labels:
Eye Snacks,
Marine LIfe
Dark Side of the Lens
My mate, Mikey Smith, has created something rather special. It is truly beautiful, have a look for yourself.
Labels:
Eye Snacks
Saturday, 21 August 2010
Sardine monologues
I just went onto my mate Bens vimeo site, he's a talented gent with the camera. This is one of his videos of a load of us mid winter messing about in the backwash at my home break Praa Sands.
Here's one of my all time favorites, him and Gay Tom were hanging out one day and came up with this, love it!
Go check out his other stuff he's a very talented bloke.
Backwash from sardinemonologues on Vimeo.
Here's one of my all time favorites, him and Gay Tom were hanging out one day and came up with this, love it!
The Serial Hobbyist from sardinemonologues on Vimeo.
Go check out his other stuff he's a very talented bloke.
Friday, 20 August 2010
How to have fun, lesson one...
Lesson number one is; If your going to do something, make sure you do it the funnest way possible.
Well, another amazing day in NWA. Although slightly tired and hungover plus the added bonus of a really burnt nose from surfing all day yesterday, myself, Dan and a few others decided to have a look at a nice beach i found the other week, it's an amazing spot with no one around. You have to get to it over a sandy track. Here's a little video of the trip back to the main road.
Well, another amazing day in NWA. Although slightly tired and hungover plus the added bonus of a really burnt nose from surfing all day yesterday, myself, Dan and a few others decided to have a look at a nice beach i found the other week, it's an amazing spot with no one around. You have to get to it over a sandy track. Here's a little video of the trip back to the main road.
Labels:
Comedy,
Eye Snacks
Sunday, 15 August 2010
Pot Shot Hotel, Exmouth, WA 6707
Exmouth is indeed a town blessed with a bounty of crazy locals and travellers a like. Most Fridays are pretty packed out with tour buses of younglings travelling up through, all of which want to let their hair down and get loose creating a haze of drunken naughtiness and random drunken adventures and if you play your cards right a good old knees up at the 'bimbo bar'.
But Saturdays and other random week nights are more of a locals thing. Last night was a typical example, with the call being spread around town that a band was to play at the Pot Shot Hotel every soul in town who likes to smash it up and dance the night away with fellow wreck heads was on it! The Bottle Shops were raided, the bars stocked ready and the girls dressed to impress, the blokes, well they were just drunk and ready to stalk the girls!
I had to work till 9, but was straight on it after and by the time i rocked up the pub was in full swing and the band rocking out. I've had many a good night at the Potty but i felt that i was missing out on some golden photo opportunities so with my camera in hand i set to make amends, here's the results...
Highlights were...
o A bit of Ray, Dan and Lloyd time, not sexual
o Hanging out with Jim, slightly sexual
o Catching up with everyone to see if anything had changed since i last saw them, which would have been 24 hours ago on the Friday night
o Mark and Adam, i swear Mark was wearing lipstick
o Hearing the best compliment ever... 'your my favourite retard'
o Hanging out with Lauren and being her phone carer for the night and also busting some serious dance moves
o Said dance moves being complimented on by a new found friend 'You two are a beautiful couple and would look great on Dancing with the Stars' I'm not sure if he knew it but neither of us are famous
o Sticky floors, slippy floors, sweaty walls and a strange set list from the so called DJ/CD
o Finny, Levi and the boys alls mashed right up
o Mitch biting my ear, that really hurt but i kinda liked it
o Watching everyone in the bar go mental when INXS came on, unreal
Here's to more nights like that.
I think i'm going to have trouble leaving this Town!
But Saturdays and other random week nights are more of a locals thing. Last night was a typical example, with the call being spread around town that a band was to play at the Pot Shot Hotel every soul in town who likes to smash it up and dance the night away with fellow wreck heads was on it! The Bottle Shops were raided, the bars stocked ready and the girls dressed to impress, the blokes, well they were just drunk and ready to stalk the girls!
I had to work till 9, but was straight on it after and by the time i rocked up the pub was in full swing and the band rocking out. I've had many a good night at the Potty but i felt that i was missing out on some golden photo opportunities so with my camera in hand i set to make amends, here's the results...
Highlights were...
o A bit of Ray, Dan and Lloyd time, not sexual
o Hanging out with Jim, slightly sexual
o Catching up with everyone to see if anything had changed since i last saw them, which would have been 24 hours ago on the Friday night
o Mark and Adam, i swear Mark was wearing lipstick
o Hearing the best compliment ever... 'your my favourite retard'
o Hanging out with Lauren and being her phone carer for the night and also busting some serious dance moves
o Said dance moves being complimented on by a new found friend 'You two are a beautiful couple and would look great on Dancing with the Stars' I'm not sure if he knew it but neither of us are famous
o Sticky floors, slippy floors, sweaty walls and a strange set list from the so called DJ/CD
o Finny, Levi and the boys alls mashed right up
o Mitch biting my ear, that really hurt but i kinda liked it
o Watching everyone in the bar go mental when INXS came on, unreal
Here's to more nights like that.
I think i'm going to have trouble leaving this Town!
Saturday, 14 August 2010
Biff Bosh Bash...
The local break here, Dunes, was pumping yesterday a bit windy but 6ft sets and clean. I surfed first thing in the Morning and being the first in the water is always exciting and i got a little carried away, as i was making my way in i wasn't paying proper attention to how the reef had changed over the last couple of days. What sand there is has shifted over the last few days, and unearthed a nasty ledge i haven't seen before.
Well unfortunately i went plowing into it toe first, creating a rather fetching slice right down the middle of my big toe. Annoyed but unperturbed i carried on and surfed for a good 3 hours whilst a good amount of blood flowed into the Indian Ocean and no doubt attracted some men in grey suits. I did see a couple of fins but i don't think i have the right blood type for sharks anyway.
I know it's only a small slice but it's hell deep and i feel a good job was done indeed. Once home i scrubbed it with limes and give it a good clean, i filmed the scrubbing bit as i thought this might entertain some of you and disturb the rest, it stung like a bitch!
Cleaning products
Before scrubbing
After scrubbing
Thats a bit better
Well unfortunately i went plowing into it toe first, creating a rather fetching slice right down the middle of my big toe. Annoyed but unperturbed i carried on and surfed for a good 3 hours whilst a good amount of blood flowed into the Indian Ocean and no doubt attracted some men in grey suits. I did see a couple of fins but i don't think i have the right blood type for sharks anyway.
I know it's only a small slice but it's hell deep and i feel a good job was done indeed. Once home i scrubbed it with limes and give it a good clean, i filmed the scrubbing bit as i thought this might entertain some of you and disturb the rest, it stung like a bitch!
Cleaning products
Before scrubbing
After scrubbing
Thats a bit better
Labels:
Comedy,
Musings and Photos
Thursday, 12 August 2010
Charles Knife Ridge
After a great early Morning Sunrise the weather turned a little bit and the wind decided to blow coupled with a strong prediction of rain, instead of hiding like most would myself, Lauren, EJ and Jim decided to go and have a look at Charles Knife, a Gorge near Exmouth.
It was only when we got there that Lauren said we should do this amazing hike, it was amazing but it was also a very narrow ledge pretty much the whole way round and with the gail force winds and driving rain, we should have turned around and gone to the pub like everyone else in Exmouth, but no, we're different, we went for it and it was absolutely amazing. We were all very wet happy people after a couple of hours, what a great day. Thanks Lauren, EJ and Jim ; )
It was only when we got there that Lauren said we should do this amazing hike, it was amazing but it was also a very narrow ledge pretty much the whole way round and with the gail force winds and driving rain, we should have turned around and gone to the pub like everyone else in Exmouth, but no, we're different, we went for it and it was absolutely amazing. We were all very wet happy people after a couple of hours, what a great day. Thanks Lauren, EJ and Jim ; )
Back to Black...
I had a pretty good shoot at Bundegi this morning and took a few in good old Black and White, with so many colours bouncing around out here it's easy to forget the beauty of pure simple Black and White. So here's a few i've done over the years and here's to you B&W...
Bundegi Walkway
Penrose Walks
Loe Bar
Porthleven
Loe Bar
Friendship Woods
Bundegi Walkway
Penrose Walks
Loe Bar
Porthleven
Loe Bar
Friendship Woods
Bundegi Pier
Wednesday, 11 August 2010
Scene Thru A Lens
Ever since I was able to hold a camera i've always had an interest in Photography and have always been keen to explore the different levels at which you can take it. A few years ago I set up my own Company, not with the intention to make money or to be famous, i did it because i wanted to share my visions with everyone, i sold my work with minimal profit because i always felt that art is over priced (it is in Cornwall anyway) and that art shouldn't be for just those who can afford it, it should be shared and enjoyed by all. Anyway, here's a few pieces that were and still are very popular. I'm sorry they have Watermarks on them but i have sold these pieces and out of respect to past clients felt it appropriate.
Surfer
I had this printed onto canvass at large scales (A0+) and it looks awesome, my Mums favourite.
Golden Daze
Another image that looked outstanding printed to large canvass, one of my favourites
Fox Glove
Taken on an Autumn Sunset on top of Tregonning Hill, near my home in Cornwall.
Rinsey Tin Mine
Cornish Tin Mines have always intrigued me. I spent most of my Childhood listening to stories about the legacy of Tin Mines, sadly most are now lost but some have been preserved like this one just round the corner from my home.
Surfer
I had this printed onto canvass at large scales (A0+) and it looks awesome, my Mums favourite.
Golden Daze
Another image that looked outstanding printed to large canvass, one of my favourites
Fox Glove
Taken on an Autumn Sunset on top of Tregonning Hill, near my home in Cornwall.
Rinsey Tin Mine
Cornish Tin Mines have always intrigued me. I spent most of my Childhood listening to stories about the legacy of Tin Mines, sadly most are now lost but some have been preserved like this one just round the corner from my home.
Things, they are a changing...
Well i no longer work at the IGA in Exmouth, I have instead progressed to Pizza Delivery boy for the local restaurant. It was my decision as i wanted my days back. I came to Australia to Surf and experience life and unfortunately even with a good wage under your belt it's easy enough to miss everything if your working everyday, so i called it off and now i only work 1800 - 2100, i know only three hours a day but i don't care. i'll just eat pasta and try to lower the alcohol intake! I've also moved out of Ponda Rosa, i was offered a caravan next to the house where good friends Little Scotty and Jake (MC Usher) live, so it's been a funny few weeks! I'm very comfy here and surprisingly the caravan doesn't scare girls away as much as they do back home.
I'll get some photos up soon.
I've also had a few other opportunities arise. Good friends and fellow maniacs Mickey, Ferg and Lowey have offered to lend me their beloved Land Cruiser, which is in storage in Perth, till they return next year. So at some point I am heading down to pick it up and get it ready for a good old Monga adventure popping in and seeing some good friends along the way.
I also spoke to my amazing and absolutely legend of a best mate, Nat, yesterday he is touring Australia with a band called the Light in September/October and he's asked if i would like to join them, he has to clear it with the rest of the boys so hopefully i'll be in there like swim wear! Imagine Monga on tour, i need to get in some serious drinking time beforehand if i'm going to survive!, cause i know how Nat party's it's strong, fast and never ending! Bring it on!
I'll keep you posted on more goings on soon, there's several new posts just below this one if you fancy a look.
Take it easy my friends. x
I'll get some photos up soon.
I've also had a few other opportunities arise. Good friends and fellow maniacs Mickey, Ferg and Lowey have offered to lend me their beloved Land Cruiser, which is in storage in Perth, till they return next year. So at some point I am heading down to pick it up and get it ready for a good old Monga adventure popping in and seeing some good friends along the way.
I also spoke to my amazing and absolutely legend of a best mate, Nat, yesterday he is touring Australia with a band called the Light in September/October and he's asked if i would like to join them, he has to clear it with the rest of the boys so hopefully i'll be in there like swim wear! Imagine Monga on tour, i need to get in some serious drinking time beforehand if i'm going to survive!, cause i know how Nat party's it's strong, fast and never ending! Bring it on!
I'll keep you posted on more goings on soon, there's several new posts just below this one if you fancy a look.
Take it easy my friends. x
Wet Gold
I've been playing around with some of my images again, i'm beginning to throw myself back into my Photography. I feel i have a certain style and eye for seeing things in an obscure manner, that's how i live my life, so i suppose that makes sense in a way.
This was taken in ankle deep water with a Macro and Polariser filters, i took the original image in a very low light as i wanted the dark tones of the sand to stand out over the lightness of the water. Enjoy...
This was taken in ankle deep water with a Macro and Polariser filters, i took the original image in a very low light as i wanted the dark tones of the sand to stand out over the lightness of the water. Enjoy...
Swandog
Just found this whilst clearing some bits and bobs out, made me laugh. Ben and Jen were over here back in March and stayed around for a few weeks, i wish they could have stayed longer though. Hope alls good on the East Coast guys, i'll hunt you down soon enough.
Brett and his 4x4 skills...
We had just had a pretty good surf a break off the coast and when we returned an old couple were pondering whether it would be safe to cross the Creek at high tide. Our man Brett just laughed and said i'll do it, i was a little dubious as to whether it was a good idea but he knew what he was doing and went full on at it...
Labels:
Eye Snacks
Sandy Bay
Tuesday, 10 August 2010
A little bit of this and a bit more of that...
I finally got round to making a little clip of us boys surfing the other day, this is a break near to where i am, but i best not mention it's name. My camera was playing up a bit, unfortunately it kept focusing on a dot of dirt on the inside of the water proof housing, very annoying as it missed most of the good waves, mainly and typically the ones i caught! But here it is anyway.
Thanks for Dan for getting out and doing a bit of filming, it's a bit shaky but he had drank 3 red bulls before going in.
Surfers include, amongst others Finny (1:56), Little Scotty, myself (2:32) and Taj.
Thanks for Dan for getting out and doing a bit of filming, it's a bit shaky but he had drank 3 red bulls before going in.
Surfers include, amongst others Finny (1:56), Little Scotty, myself (2:32) and Taj.
Labels:
Eye Snacks,
Marine LIfe
Church missions back in the day...
I'm not one to attend Churches much, well never, but when myself and fellow freak Rohanimal came up with the idea that we could abuse the so called good nature and name of the Church, we went at it like a bull in a China shop. Heres some memories of those traitorous days!
Labels:
Comedy,
Musings and Photos
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